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(no subject)

Sep. 26th, 2006 | 09:09 pm

the ragamuffin pulled herself out of the carcass and rolled around in the grass. she cooed to the silversmith, "thank you for helping me." he took off his apron and protective goggles and stuck her with his iron rod until she screamed bloody murder. then he filled in the bloody hole with molten tungsten. the tungsten solidified, fusing with her skin and internal organs. he placed her dirty body in straw hut behind his shop. she didn't understand why he had impaled her and filled her with liquid metal. he came back and said, "you are safe here. there is nothing to be afraid of. you are making a fresh start and i want make sure that you are prepared this time. the metal will

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(no subject)

Sep. 21st, 2006 | 10:55 pm

the ragamuffin disppeared. the angel flew down to the churning basin below but the ragamuffin wasn't there. she waited. and waited. and waited. but nothing came to the surface. finally, a single piece of red cloth emerged. and then a few seconds later a bloody carcass surfaced. the angel picked up the body and carried it to shore. it built a small hut out of reeds from the riverside and placed the carcass inside. "she is naked but she is dead. she will never be healed." the angel set fire to the hut, destroying the carcass. "better gone than dead." so the angel left the pyre, hoping to catch a glimpse of the ragamuffin's soul as it returned to the source. but there was no apparition. so the angel circled the waterfall. still no sign. then as it passed by the face of the waterfall it saw bright light. it followed the light to a source behind the waterfall. there was a small grotto behind the wall of white water. inside the grotto was a small, silver orb that shined like the moon. it pulsated slowly and sounded like a swarm of bees. the angel picked up. it was cool, shiny and heavy, about the size of a canteloupe. it looked into the orb to see its relfection and to its surprise it saw the ragamuffin. it looked again and still saw the ragamuffin. it pulled the orb close and kissed the ragamuffin but nothing happened. the mist from the waterfall covered up the lip marks. the angel placed the orb on the ground. it pulled a large rock from the wall and proceeded to break open the orb. but it was no use. the metal egg was imprenetrable. so the angel left. three weeks later the angel returned with a net, placed the orb in the net and carried it to a nearby silversmith who melted the orb in his furnace. when he pulled the remains out the fire the angel gasped. on the end of his rod was a paper clip, which was apparently strong enough to withstand very high temperatures. the angel took the paper clip and ate it. moments later a gurgling sound came from its mouth. it began vomiting hysterically until it fell over, apparently choking to death. then something began clawing at the inside of its stomach. the stomach grew larger and larger until the flesh tore apart, revealing a bloody child who resembled the ragamuffin.

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(no subject)

Sep. 17th, 2006 | 09:51 pm

"and you won't because you are afraid," said the angel. "what is wrong with not wanting risk your life," said the ragamuffin. "it is wrong to deny yourself. get rid of the shell that you have built to protect you from people. you have many pearls. do not save them. sell them. you must take this risk, otherwise you will be a ragamuffin forever. you will always be dirty and haggard, and you will always live in that decrepit hut." "but i am happy in my clothes, in my hut. i don't mind being dirty." "but it is just a shell. a skin. you are wearing a skin and it is not yours. it is the one that reflects your soul. your downtrodden soul. you don't know what it is to be truly happy. happiness comes from accepting the truth and shedding all skins. removing all pretense. at least you are honest. you look how you feel. that is a sign you are in pain. you have no self-respect. you are not happy." "but i don't mind being dirty. it's not a big deal..." "it's not important to look clean, but it is important to feel clean. do you feel clean?" "no. but i am happy." "no you aren't." "i am so. i am perfectly happy inside my hut. please take me back." "that hut is gone. god has burned it to the ground. do you want to see?" the angel pulled a photograph from under its wing. "you are lying. my house is still there. take me back, i want to go home!" "i'm sorry but you'll just have to wait. this is your new home." "but we are next to a waterfall. what kind of home is this?" "home is not a shelter. it is not a place. it is nothingness. can you picture nothingness?" "i don't know. this is all too weird. just take me home." and the the angel picked up the ragamuffin and dropped her in the river. soaked, she cried, "stop it! stop it! i can't get wet. i will dieeeeeeeee!" "maybe so, but isn't this fun?!" "no! i am drowning, and i will die if you don't help me. help meeeeeeee!" the angel just watched her as she went over the waterfall, screaming and crying.

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(no subject)

Sep. 6th, 2006 | 10:10 pm
mood: mellowmellow
music: champagne supernova - oasis

"no one is there to hold you," said the angel. "then i am not going over the waterfall." "no one will hold you because you don't love anyone. i can't hold you. i am part of you. you hid away in that decrepit hut for years, letting helpful thinkers pass you by. you never let them rescue you from your pain. now you are afraid to unravel because you have never unraveled before." "so i don't have to go over the waterfall?" "no."

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(no subject)

Sep. 4th, 2006 | 09:09 pm
mood: sleepysleepy
music: the laws have changed - the new pornographers

the ragamuffin and the angel flew off into the clouds and landed on top of a large waterfall. as they hovered the angel said, "here is where you find out what you are made of. fall into the water and let the water carry you over the edge. don't worry about the fall, i will be there to catch you if something goes wrong." the ragamuffin resisted, "i don't WANT to go over a waterfall! i will fall to pieces if i get wet. i am nothing but rags and dust. and i will surely perish if i hit a rock on the way down." "you will be fine. i am your guardian angel. don't you trust me?" "no, i don't. who knows what lies beneath the surface?!" "i will catch you if you are in danger. just let the water carry you down. enjoy the fall. it will not hurt if you are relaxed." "but i don't believe you. let's go back to my hut. i left some of my safety pins there. i won't stay together without my safety pins!" "you may fall apart, but it's not going to hurt. you may loose your clothes, but you'll be fine. don't worry about being naked because i am the only one who can see you." "but i don't want to be naked. i don't want you to see me naked!" "i can't make you go over the waterfall. you don't trust me." "why do i have to go over the waterfall?" "because you are afraid of falling apart." "but what if i fall apart and no one is there to hold me?"

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ornery tale

Aug. 31st, 2006 | 11:40 pm

when the angel finished wiping her tears the ragamuffin was gone. she didn't know what to do but follow the beastly men from a distance. so she spread her gallant wings and flew into the midday sun. it took her awhile to sniff out their trail, but she found them, just as they were about to enter an abandoned mineshaft. she thought, "what will they do to her?" the ragamuffin was overcome with emotion. the attention from her male captors was nourishment for her starving heart. they removed the boards that sealed the mineshaft and went inside. the angel was reluctant to attack the caravan, fearing the worst for the ragamuffin. she wasn't strong enough to fight the men, but she had to protect the ragamuffin from danger. they would rape her mind, fill it with evil thoughts, and force her to mistrust herself if she didn't take action. so she entered the shaft and came upon the men and said, "you can't control because you are not in control. you were controlled, and you are slaves to your own minds now. you will not poison this ragamuffin with the same toxins you were fed." they laughed, not understanding a word of what she said. "you will leave her alone. she is not your project, nor your fool, nor your toy, nor your amusement, nor your bitch." "that's not true," they said. "we love her and she loves us. look how happy she is with us." "but she won't stay happy. you're winning her over with your charm, but soon the holiday will end. you'll toss her aside when you've tamed her. then she will do anything to garner your attention. she is starved for love, and she thinks your attention is love. you are feeding her crumbs when she deserves a birthday cake. she will never know love if she stays with you. you don't know what love is, and you can't give it to her." "love? we are having a good time, that's all that matters." "it's not about having a good time. you will tire of her and you will toss her aside and look for the next victim to waste. she is meaningless. she is worthless. she can't satisfy you. no one ever will." "we are not going to release her." "but she is worthless to you. look inside yourself. you will find a void that she will fill. but like any drug, she will fail to satisfy completely. you will always want more. you will always want control. you can't hold on to something that isn't there. you are holding on because you never had anything to hold on to. but you don't know that you don't have to hold on to something in order to have it. you have to love it. and if you never received love, how can you give it? ragamuffin, i love you, but you don't know it. you can hear me but you don't think i am real. i am in your head and no one is allowed inside but me. i am your soul, your spirit, your heart! you love you, and you don't even know it! you don't need them. they come and go, but you are always with yourself." "but i need someone to love," said the ragamuffin. "we all do, and you will find that person some day. but not until you find yourself." "how do i find myself?" "go to sleep and dream about starfish and snow cones and pesticide. then you will wake up refreshed for the next day. then you take out a hammer and smash a mirror until you look like a damaged starlet. pick up the pieces and drop them into liquid hydrogen until they form a sparkly mosaic. hang it on your wall and spend time looking at it. it will talk to you if you ask it. you may hear my voice." the men sat down in the coal dust and the ragamuffin ran to the angel. "let's go home."

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vilfied cherub

Aug. 30th, 2006 | 09:37 pm
mood: tiredtired
music: blues from a gun - jesus & mary chain

one day an earthly angel comes upon what appears to be an abandoned alpine hut. inside she finds a ragamuffin wincing in the corner. after a bit of prodding, she finds that the child has a chest infection that can only be remedied by traveling to next valley, which lies beyond a ridge of treacherous mountains. she grabs the ragamuffin and scurries to the door, and, exposing her majestic wings, flies them over the snow-capped mountains and into the next valley. they touch down and come upon weary sot who takes them to the local medicine man. he says, "i cannot help her. she has a broken heart, and she is the only one who can fix it." "but what does she need to do?" says the angel. "she needs to mangle her troubles so they are unrecognizable. she will never get rid of them, but they will be out of sight." he says. "how do you mangle your troubles?" "honestly, mangling doesn't work. here's a simple trick that has worked wonders for other girls. reach inside your birth canal, and, with both hands, spread yourself apart until you are inside-out. your insides will be exposed and it will be easier to remove the cancer from your body. your arms will be inside you, so someone else will have to remove the tissue for you. so, you see, you must allow yourself to be vulnerable before anyone can help you mend your broken heart. you could do it yourself, but you won't have anyone cradle you when you fall. i've seen so many girls that try to do it by themselves and they become insane. they can't function in society. it's sad. but if you help this ragamuffin, i think she will have a healthy heart someday." so they go to a nearby tavern and order some porridge. when they are about to leave, and man stands up and says, "how much for the girl?" and the angel says, "what do you mean?" "how much to take that ragamuffin off your hands? she'll be safe in the company of me and my associates." "she'll be fine without you." "ah, but yer makin' a mistake. she doesn't want a pale saint like yerself. she wants the company of men. we'll show her a good time, and she'll forget she ever had any problems..." "she's not interested." "yer makin' a mistake there, angel. you got nothing she wants. you can't give her what she neeeeeds." "and what is that?' "a good poke in the ars!" the associates begin to cackle. "tell you what, we're just going to take her. how's that sound?" "no!" but the angel couldn't stop them. the ragamuffin said, "i'll be okay. they're just a bunch of guys. what's the worst that could happen?" the angel couldn't believe what she was hearing. the ragamuffin's heart was broken, and she was running off with a bunch of preying buffoons. "but your heart, what about your heart!?" "i feel good now, angel. all this attention has revived me. i'm cured." and so the ragamuffin left with the men.

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Aug. 29th, 2006 | 11:54 pm
mood: naughtynaughty

she cups her hands and collects a wrinkled apendage from her father's closet. she sighs as she places it in her oven, where it bakes until it is stiff and spongy. she removes it from the cookie sheet and begins to toy with it, licking it, tasting it. it gets softer with each lick, and soon she is left with a soggy piece of dough. she says, "what will i do? i have ruined my father's appendage. i have defiled it and brought shame to our family." so she takes out a knife and cuts the dough into chunks, which she forms into small pots. she places the pots into her kiln and dries them until they are dark and crusty. "i know how to vindicate myself," she says. "i will paint them beautiful colors and give them to my father." the next day she gives them to her father and he says, "have you seen my wrinkled appendage? somebody took it from my closet." "no," she replies. "i made you these pots. do you like them?" "i want my appendage. you make nice pots, but there is nothing more important than that appendage." so she takes the pots and smashes them. the next day she picks up the pieces and, using all of her strength and resources, tries to reform the appendage. it does not work. she cannot give her father what he wants. she begins to cry.

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(no subject)

Aug. 24th, 2006 | 11:56 pm
mood: goodgood
music: machine gun - slowdive

rolly poly round about
enough already shout it out
sinful rhythms bumble bee
buzz around the apple tree

i know you and you know me
let's go get our kicks for free
painful schizms reconcile
another taste of heaven's bile

always reaping what we sow
learning what we shouldn't know
tantrums birth another seed
the product of a sinner's bleed

an empty mind is what we seek
forgetting how to stop the leak
i want to find a happy place
can we go to outer space?

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shambolic meld

Aug. 22nd, 2006 | 11:35 pm
mood: okayokay
music: it's getting late - galaxie 500

another day of wanting meaning
it's just another way of seeing
how much i need to find a way
to get beyond my mind today

you'll never know how much it means
to see a way inside my dreams
i know i want to come to feeling
because the past is so revealing

never more will answers be
so fleeting fast you'll softly see
how hearts and minds can sympathize
i want to open up your eyes

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